Good evening lovely readers!
Today is a special day and I have exciting news to share with you!!
I have officially signed up for my class at the university, and it starts at the end of January. I’ll be taking Beginners Indigenous language. Ever since I was a child I’ve wanted to study an Indigenous language and now it’s another thing off my bucket list; something I didn’t think I’d ever get to do.
The process of becoming a student at the university was a shitpit of cock ups, and I will probably not do it again any time soon. I was incredibly frustrated with how poorly it was run and how little information I was provided with. At one point I threw in the towel and said fuck it. I won’t study anything while I’m here because it was such an upwards battle just to become a student. Jack had to pick me up from the floor, as he so often does with a broken wife, but finally it seems everything has worked out.
Today I registered for the class. I hope the young child in me appreciates the endless dreams I bring to fruition for her. It’s led me on a lost path somewhere to the west of everyone else, but her little dreams are coming true. I might not be able to make her a truly happy soul but I can give her a life that she can tell stories about and smile, even if it is for but a fleeting moment. I’ll give her whatever I have and none of it could be done without Jack backing me.
There’s nothing in this world I can’t do, at least i feel that way sometimes, and I can be proud that I picked others up along the way. And I am. Never in my life have I stood on a broken back or laughed at the face of paucity. The only person I have ever hindered has been myself, but I’m working on that. When I was little my mother would braid my hair and send me out into a world where everyone but me spoke English. I was terrified. However when I stepped out of our house looking like Pippi Longstocking, feeling like there was nothing I couldn’t do…nothing could break me. Now I speak better English than the men round the Queens table.
I hold on to this memory with everything I have. I’m still that little kid with long red pigtails, big front teeth and i was strong enough to carry a horse. I glide through life making people laugh, struggling and dreaming and remembering and hating the nostalgia. And going on poetic rants on blog posts…apparently.
It’ll be strange to be a student once more. Not that I suppose I ever stopped being a student – we’re all children of the world after all and we should never stop learning. 95% learning can’t be done in a class room which is why instead of following everyone else to university… I went to the coast and sailed with my best friend. Then I flew to America. And you know the basics.
This evening my heart can rest. Today I did something for me that I have wanted and wished for. Something to help me onwards on the path I’ve taken.
Well, it’s īsibī-ta-nī-ni, time for lying down.
And I wish you a good night and happy dreaming.